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I was inspired to write about gifts today as it seems that I am surrounded by this concept lately.

From a variety of sources, I have come across the topic of receiving and giving.

How do I give how do I receive?

Gifts that we possess. What are my gifts?

What are some gifts that one can give and/or receive from humans and animals?

The general idea of giving … is there a connection linked and/or an expectation?

How does this relate to my life, my purpose what I do?

Medicine from the horses vs. gifts from the horses.

In my own interpretation a gift is something you give or do for someone and do not expect anything in return. A pay on the other hand is you give or do something for someone, and you are given something for what you have done. It basically says you did this for me, and I paid you and so you and I have no connection. If the pay doesn’t come, there is a conflict because there is an expectation for a return it is an agreement or engagement.

A pay encourages separateness and an end to a connection. However, a gift creates interconnectedness between two people or more. I like to think that we are all ONE and each of our individuality creates that ONEness. So, I like the gifting concept. It also encourages a feeling of satisfaction on the giver’s part. Let’s admit, giving a gift when the intention is honest feels good no matter the gift shape, size or form.

However, when someone actively offers me a gift in any form, that it be a compliment, a helping hand, an opportunity, a coffee, a visit or anything else I have found myself feeling that I owe them. Which I shouldn't. This is not interconnectedness and I know that but the feelings of owing them is uncomfortable. That comes from my distorted belief system that I am not here to receive but rather to give. This is such a trap because I have given of myself so often that I enabled people to take advantage of me. As this is where, I have to self talk and accept people's gifts and understand that they gave and are giving with good intention to create connection of goodwill rather than me owing them.

What type of gifts are there? There is such a variety. It could be an exchange of time given or received from someone in the form or a service, help, lending something, etc. It could be a compliment, a lesson of life even currency.

I have received so many gifts in my life and I am eternally grateful for them. And these mainly came in the form of lessons of life from people and animals that crossed my path and what these experiences created: someone – ME – that has evolved and grown in wisdom, self-awareness, spiritually etc. which I really like.

This engages another thought in my mind: I have gifts. The gift of teaching, leadership, resiliency, Faith, connectedness, intuition, insight etc. I was given gifts by God – we all were - and when I realized that working for somebody doing what mattered for somebody else and not for me made me feel like a slave - to the exception I was getting paid- I came to that realization, nothing seemed to fit anymore. I was not using my gifts in a way that gave me satisfaction and fulfilled my purpose.

The agreement of doing the work I was asked and in return getting money was not satisfactory consequently I decided to make changes in my life. Challenging myself to be courageous, to believe and to trust in my purpose has been rewarding and is offering me continued growth the way I want to grow.

I am grateful for my life which includes the ups and downs. I am grateful for the people and animals that came on my path providing me this growth. You see all of this were gifts to me which I had no one to pay or receive pay for but provided me a connectedness to them and to myself. I find appreciating your life’s path and finding personal growth in the events is a gift that has not price on it.

I recall being uncomfortable getting money when I first offered services to help people. This is what I wanted to do: help people. Use my gifts and share with people. I became confused with the concept of asking money in return. I felt uncomfortable because of my beliefs around living my purpose and getting paid for it. If you want to help people, how can you ask for money? I recall helping many people and not asking for anything in return and/or not asking for a justifiable return. On one hand it made me feel good as I was the one offering but then I started feeling like it was expected of me and my desire to help these people lessened because of the expectation that came with it. I was no longer offering them a gift. I was delivering on their expectations.

When you give something or of yourself it is because it makes you feel good and you made the decision to do so. The good feeling is not felt when someone’s expectation is removing the pleasure of doing something, helping someone and there is an expectation that there should be or not be a return or exchange.

So, I started looking hard at how I can justify helping people, living my purpose, using my gifts and feeling that having an exchange can keep a connection between us at al level that supports our ONEness which is part of my belief system.

The concept of being able to say I have the best job in the world where I am helping other people and getting paid for my efforts resonated with me and I can say with comfort: “What could be better than help in this world whilst I am keeping myself looked after at the same time”? Besides I have to pay all these expenses to keep my partners, my herd. It is also expected from my bank that I pay my mortgage, and other living expenses paid off. I have invested in my education to enhance my gifts and so I can look at getting “gifts” from people who I offer help to.

My herd contributes by offering their medicine as a gift to the clients that connect with them. They do so without judgement, without expectations and with such generosity. And believe me it is a gift like no other gifts. The sharing of our gifts (with or without the herd), provides a connection and an experience that cannot disconnect me or my horses from the clients.

I am committed to helping them on their path of self awareness and how to discover and activate their Sacred Gifts. I am dedicated at helping them change sabotaging perspectives and releasing blocks that prevent them from living the life they wish to live. Why? Because I’ve been there, done that and I’m doing that. Doing this is my life purpose and being acknowledged for my help by receiving a monetary exchange is part of what giving is. What is good for you is good for me and it is a cycle of gift giving that contributes to the greater good of all.

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